Compassion. It’s a trait I thought I always had, but honestly I was so consumed with my own grief that I was truly unable to be compassionate towards others. I wanted to be, and in my heart of hearts I was, but I didn’t know how to express it. Over the past several months my heart has been renewed so it can feel again. It can hurt for others. It can genuinely empathize. It can hope for others. I never really felt like my heart was hardened, but it definitely was calloused.
Over the past few weeks as my heart has been exposed I have been able to experience compassion. It’s raw and it is good! I cry a lot for others, but that’s really nothing new. My mind is open to the brokenness of others and my heart hurts for them. I see mothers struggling to fight for their life, sick babies in hospitals, and tragedy’s that feel beyond repair. Before it was easy to write things off and move on with my life. Now I stop and I’m thankful for the blessings in my life. This feeling empowers me to want to reach out in whatever way I can. When I reach out it not only help others, but I get to serve the Lord.
Sometimes my compassion comes out when I serve my family (cause I still struggle with self sacrifice). But it has also opened me up to the opportunities out in the world. It makes me bold enough to offer a helping hand or to lend an ear. It invites me into conversations with complete strangers. The amazing thing about compassion is that it not only blesses others, but it fills up my bucket (that’s for the teachers out there ;0). I want to be a bucket filler!
It’s so easy to become selfish and desire to serve the flesh. In all honesty there were moments in my life where I wanted to run. I felt like I was at the end of my rope. But what always kept me coming back was my family. When I needed to get home to feed Grey or when Tommy would send a message asking me if I wanted to go to Disneyland. In those moments my heart would be glad and I would remember others matter. Compassion allows you to experience real love. Putting the needs and hurts of others over your own allows for God to love you and fill the void in your heart. Boy have I learned that lesson in a big way. But I am so thankful, compassion has allowed me to see the people in my life and truly love them with an open heart.
It is well with my Soul 