This week was the first time I stepped foot in my childhood church. The one we attended when my mom passed away. I didn’t know what to expect or how I would feel. After my mom passed away I chose the gate of resentment, anger, bitterness and unforgiveness. Those feelings overflowed from my heart and I turned my back on God. Continue reading “Cry Wolf”
Category: All the praise hands
Home
Today I feel at home. For so many years after my mom died and times would get tough I would cry out that I just wanted to go home. Then my sister got married and she called me saying the same thing. Something about not having your mom to run to makes you long for home. The saying goes, “home is where your heart is.” Continue reading “Home”
Liar, Liar Pants on Fire
The Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky says this about lies, “A man who lies to himself, and believes his own lies, becomes unable to recognize truth, either in himself or in anyone else, and he ends up losing respect for himself and for others. When he has no respect for anyone, he can no longer love, and in him, he yields to his impulses, indulges in the lowest form of pleasure, and behaves in the end like an animal in satisfying his vices. And it all comes from lying–to others and to yourself.” Continue reading “Liar, Liar Pants on Fire”
Jack of All Trades, Master of None
For the past year I have tried to be so strong. I have tried to juggle packing, moving, raising kids, being a wife, all while trying to make time for myself. Busyness seemed to rule my life. I went from one task to the next, to the next and to the next. I didn’t know how to rest. Continue reading “Jack of All Trades, Master of None”
Today
I have always been a planner. When Tommy and I met he encouraged me to accept my calling as a special education teacher. Once I had that goal in mind I set out to accomplish it. Continue reading “Today”
Perfect Love
Fear is so paralyzing sometimes, at the least it’s distracting. After my mom died I had this fear of feeling that pain again. Continue reading “Perfect Love”
Walking the Line
I have seen and experienced joy and I have experienced pain and brokenness. Something I am learning right now is how to respond to life. Life isn’t as glamorous as the movies portray. I had never faced real tragedy in my life. My parents were married. My mom beat cancer. She just turned 50 and fabulous. Then she called me to tell me she needed a second heart surgery.
Sunshine
I have admitted a lot of my shortcomings recently. I wanted to take responsibility for my journey that lead me to this moment in my life. Continue reading “Sunshine”
Heart Wide Open
Compassion. It’s a trait I thought I always had, but honestly I was so consumed with my own grief that I was truly unable to be compassionate towards others. I wanted to be, and in my heart of hearts I was, but I didn’t know how to express it. Over the past several months my heart has been renewed so it can feel again. It can hurt for others. It can genuinely empathize. It can hope for others. I never really felt like my heart was hardened, but it definitely was calloused. Continue reading “Heart Wide Open”
Love Bugs
It’s been a year since I left the classroom and took a full time job as a mom and wife. It was something I had wanted for a long time. I was torn between work and always feeling drained. I realized I had so much patience with my students and by the time I got home I felt like I had ran out or patience. I am finding out that there is a small caveat to that thought. After a year of moving to Minnesota for six months and then moving back to California I have learned a few things… Continue reading “Love Bugs”
It is well with my Soul 